Lads, look at this page of mental illness from the Mr T annual:
In the spirit of ‘fuck it, put some jokes in, that’ll fill a page’, the writers of this annual appear to have never met Mr T, heard of Mr T, or even used the letter T before.
Even Mr T looks confused.
Continue reading “Mr T tells shit jokes”
Like all weirdos, I love Sonic the Hedgehog, I always have. I even have a tattoo of the blue bastard on my arm. However, even I draw the line at Sonic’s behaviour as demonstrated in his official 1991/92 annual.
‘Blue blur’? More like ‘Fucking dickhead’, as we will discover.
Continue reading “Pages from the Sonic the Dickhead annual”
I bought this, which is definitely not trying to be a Transformer:
It’s not a Transformer, it is a SUPER ROBOT, can’t you read? It is a Dirt Boss (or an Oirt Boss, hard to tell) from the Change Series, and it is 5 powerful. Continue reading “Corner Shop Crap: Roberts in disguise”
I’m mostly reviewing this episode because I’ve thought of the world’s best joke, to be inserted into one of the scenes. I’ll let you know when we get to the world’s best joke so you won’t miss it, don’t worry.
Let’s begin. George is attempting to sing ‘Old McDonald Had A Farm’. However, he is faced with two obstacles:
1. Zippy keeps doing the wrong animal noises like a shitlord
2. George is stupid.
The combination of these two factors leads to George losing his shit with Zippy and calling him “silly”, which is the Rainbow universe equivalent of calling him a blithering cunt.
Continue reading “Rainbow episode review: George’s bum football”
Check it out lads, I’ve found the world’s shittest plate:
Right, imagine you’ve just made a Christmas themed plate with all cats on it. I don’t know why you’ve done this, maybe someone was pointing a gun at you. Anyway, what do you call it? Continue reading “A plate full of cats”
You know how sometimes Geoffrey gets sick of everyone’s shit and fucks off, leaving Bungle in charge? This is one of those times.
Geoffrey’s gone on a narrowboat holiday with Rod, Jane and Freddy, probably in Norfuck. Great job Geoffrey – they definitely won’t do anything like burn the house down or fall for a PPI scam.
Might I remind you that last time you went out and left Bungle in charge, he dressed up as Superman and this was his version of ‘being in charge’.
Continue reading “Rainbow episode review: Three divs in a boat”
I hate using the phone. I’m guessing you all hate using the phone too. This is because they have the ability to turn a harmless human being into a frightening, disembodied voice. Most telephones also come with an inbuilt translation device, which turns phrases like ‘Hello, can I speak to Mr Jones please?’ into ‘I am a demon spawn and I like to drink my own wee.’
If only there was a handy, out of date instructional film to show us how to use the phone properly.
I present to you – The Telephone At Work, which tells you everything you need to know about using the telephone at work. In 1972. Continue reading “How to use the phone in 1972”