Today we’re getting our Indiana Jones pants on and going exploring! Not sure if a guy rips another guy’s heart out, probably not. I think they’ll probably just look at some interesting pebbles. I guess we’ll never know if we don’t start the episode.
Bungle is using binoculars to explore the garden. This is despite the fact that everything in the garden is A) less than six inches away, and B) drawn on. No wonder he looks so confused.
George manages to out-idiot Bungle by asking Geoffrey if elephants live in nests. They do not. They live in flats and are called Jenny.
Bungle carries on with his ridiculous binoculars plan. What do you know – he’s found some interesting pebbles!
Those pebbles definitely are interesting due to them not being pebbles. Or if they are, the Rainbow gang should start worrying that radioactive waste has leaked into their garden.
And anyway, I think the one on the right is a Kinder egg inside bit that someone’s stood on.
Next they find a hedgehog, which is definitely real.
This prompts them to declare that the garden is “like a jungle”, proving that they’ve never been in a jungle, or seen a picture of one, or even heard the word ‘jungle’ before. Although I think you do get hippos in the jungle, but you don’t get broken Kinder eggs and hedgehogs.
I hope Bungle finds some catshit with his binoculars. That’ll learn him.
The gang decide to play jungle explorers, which is brilliant because it means they have to get the dressing up box out. For some reason, Bungle decides ‘pregnant flasher’ is a suitable look for Geoffrey.
“Bungle, stop being such a twat, I can dress myself,” says Geoffrey. Great job Geoffrey.
Zippy wonders what it would be like to really be in the jungle. He drifts off into a daydream…
I’m not sure why Zippy is imagining everything being on fire.
“It’s very hot in this jungle.”
I’m not fucking surprised since it’s on fire.
The rest of the gang catch up with him, and they all stand there crapping on about how they didn’t expect to find things like monkeys and trees in the jungle. I am now 100% convinced they didn’t mean ‘jungle’, they meant ‘Tesco car park’. That would explain the broken Kinder egg.
Meanwhile, we catch Geoffrey during peak eye roll.
Bungle runs off after a butterfly. Geoffrey sort of makes a half-arsed attempt to shout after him, but not really. I bet he’s secretly pleased.
Geoffrey’s sense of duty prevails, however, and he decides the three of them are going to have to go look for Bungle. Why? In case he gets eaten? By a bear? Out of the four of them, I’d say it’s Bungle who has the best chance of survival in the jungle.
Wow, Bungle’s gone a hell of a long way. It’s night time where he is.
You know what? I take back the earlier comment about Bungle surviving in the jungle. He might win a fight with, I dunno, that butterfly he was after, but that’s about it.
Bungle’s peril and imminent death are obviously a prefect cue for a Rod, Jane and Freddy song about going out for the day in matching outfits.
Look guys, I’m sure you’re having a lovely day out, but you can’t leave us with that cliffhanger. Bungle’s about to die! This is really not the time.
Back to Bungle, who hasn’t eaten for at least ten minutes and is wasting away.
Then this happens:
Would it have killed Bungle to sort of look vaguely in the direction the director threw the banana from? I’ve watched this clip 79 times so far.
Geoffrey arrives, and the two of them bump into each other, shitting themselves in the process.
Then Geoffrey decides that what they all need is a story, after trekking in the jungle for 12 hours and nearly dying.
I can’t concentrate because I can’t stop thinking about that banana thing.
This is my face:
The story involves Bungle dancing because he’s got itchy balls or something, I forget the details.
Then Zippy’s daydream ends, and we’re back in the garden. So I guess we have Zippy to blame for Bananagate? But there’s no time to think about that now, because the others are all waiting for Zippy to stop dicking around so they can go find more tennis balls and dogshit.
Seriously. I won’t sleep tonight now.