My first men’s shaving kit for girls

So, this is a thing that exists:

It’s some sort of men’s barber playset, but it’s aimed at five year old girls. It might not look like a barber playset, but trust me on this.

‘Had Better’. They’re not wrong. I mean, I have had better.

The picture of Barbie is never really explained. I like to think they were just shit at English, and got their ‘Barbie/barber’ mixed up.

Now then, let’s have a look at what a typical ‘unlicensed Barbie themed men’s shaving playset’ consists of.

Before we proceed, can we all just take a moment to acknowledge that I’m 36 years old and I’m reviewing this.

Cut throat razor

A lot sharper than you’d expect. I think you could cut yourself on it with enough effort. I ‘had better’ not go near it again.

Handbag

At first I thought the button things on it might have been actual buttons that did cool stuff, like making the whole thing explode. Sadly they’re just for decoration. The bag does open though, exactly how a real handbag opens:

Thinking about it, I’m not sure you’re supposed to do that with it. I might have broken it.

Head shaver

It even has the word ‘barber’ on it, in case whoever is playing with it forgets they’re a barber. It also claims to be scissors. Sadly it’s not really electric, so you just have to pretend while making a sort of ‘rrrrrrrrrrrrr’ noise.

Mobile phone

For answering haircut emergencies. Makes a noise when I shake it, so at first I thought it had some sort of surprise in it. But it’s just that the aerial isn’t stuck in properly and the whole thing’s a bit shit. Also, the time on the clock reads ’24:30′.

This Barbie/barber universe has at least 25 hours a day.

Best scissors container

There are no scissors in this, and it’s not big enough to be able to store the scissors/head shaver multi tool. So I don’t know what it’s for really. Keeping pills in? Whatever it’s for, it’s the best.

Misc

These are like oversized lockets, but I’m not sure what they have to do with barbering.

Fuck knows

Oh wait. After some research (sitting here wondering about it while I scratch my bum), I think I know what it’s supposed to be. It folds out, and I think it’s meant to be a sign for your shop:

You put this outside your place of business like a barber pole, and the world can see you’re a barber. Or a Barbie. Actually, all your customers can see from that is that you really like Barbie. None of the barbers in my town have a picture of Barbie outside their shops.

I’m 100% convinced I’m right about the Barbie/barber thing.

Fin.

If you’d like to help support the blog, check out my Patreon for loads of extra shit.