Rainbow episode review: In space no one can hear you in space

In this episode, the lads go to space for the afternoon. It’s not super realistic, but the bits filmed in space are pretty good.

Let’s begin. We’re thrown straight into the action, as everyone teleports onto a random planet and then acts a bit confused as if they were expecting to be at Lidl.

1

“This isn’t Lidl,” says Bungle. “There isn’t even a tights ‘n’ bra section for Jane.” Continue reading “Rainbow episode review: In space no one can hear you in space”

The shelf of shit

The shelf of shit

It’s occurred to me that I’ve become a hoarder. However, I’ve become a hoarder of awesome stuff, so there’s no need for me to go on one of those TV shows where they wee in a shoe and cook with a candle because they need to own all the copies of Railway Enthusiast ever published.

I like to think of myself as a curator rather than a hoarder. Hoarding is for people like my other half, which is why we have a box full of old phone chargers that “we might need one day”. If we ever invent time travel and really, really need to charge a phone to, I don’t know, text the boy band A1.

Anyway, I’ve decided to gather some of my best objets d’art and display them on a shelf, so you can look at them and go “hmmmm”, as if you were in a real museum, and not sat at home looking at my shit blog.

I present – the shelf of shit!

shelf of shit

OK, I’ll comment on each section. I’ve numbered them, but if you can’t figure out which ones I’m referring to, you’re a bit of a div. Continue reading “The shelf of shit”

A girls’ night in with the Echo Falls Girls’ Night In kit

A girls’ night in with the Echo Falls Girls’ Night In kit

Lads, I’ve had an idea, and it’s going to be great. Look what I got at the supermarket:

IMG_20190221_214151

It’s a super fun Girls’ Night In kit, and I’m going to use it to have a super fun Girls’ Night In.

According to the box, this is everything you need to have fun for an entire evening. Disclaimer: the box does not say that, but it’s pretty heavily implied. Continue reading “A girls’ night in with the Echo Falls Girls’ Night In kit”

Stardew Valley charity Twitch marathon

Stardew Valley charity Twitch marathon

This Sunday (24th Feb) I’ll be live on Twitch from Midday to Midnight as part of GameBlast 19, raising money for a charity called Special Effect.

For extra fun and japes, I’ve never done a livestream before. Nothing can go wrong.

oh shit

Special Effect are a group of tech geniuses who provide specialist and modified gaming and computer equipment to people with disabilities. The equipment they provide is tailored to each individual need, and is completely free of charge. They also provide pioneering “Stargaze” equipment, allowing users to control computers with eye movements. (Seriously, I think they might be wizards.)

Below are a few videos showing the work they do, and the people they help:

Ceyda

Lewis

Sam

If you’d like to join me, please follow me on Twitch (theworldofcrap) and check out the Just Giving page for the livestream.

I’ll be playing Stardew Valley for 12 hours straight, so please come and keep me company. If you’re not familiar with it, Stardew Valley is an awesome farming/dating sim in the style of the Harvest Moon series. I’m really counting on people joining me on Twitch and keeping me sane as I grow 30,000 parsnips, and follow villagers around until they agree to marry me. Help a good cause, and witness me having a slow nervous breakdown. There’s literally no downside to this.

Hope to see you guys there!

World of Crap presents Battle of the Pens

World of Crap presents Battle of the Pens

Today we are going to sit down and decide, once and for all, which pens are brilliant and which are shit. I’m doing you this service, an enormous cost to myself, so you can decide which pen to write your masterpiece with.

I was going to rank these pens in order, but have decided not to, for two reasons:

1: There are too many different kinds of pens on this list.

2: I can’t be bothered.

With that in mind, let’s crack on…

4 colour biro

4 colour

Do you remember 1928, when we all went around with four separate biros stuffed in our front pockets? And, because it was 1928, they weren’t stuffed in our front pockets, but in our aprons and top hats. I assume.

Then someone invented a way to spend less time carrying separate biros around, so we had more time to concentrate on having scurvy and the plague. Continue reading “World of Crap presents Battle of the Pens”

An essay on sexy cat food adverts

An essay on sexy cat food adverts

Thanks to Patrick Heaviside for giving me this stupid idea in the first place.

You know what it’s like. The cat’s nagging you because you haven’t fed it for a week. So you feed the cat, and then it starts talking like Fenella Fielding and decides it wants to do sex with you. Happens every Saturday.

NO IT FUCKING DOESN’T.

This is the main reason I’ve been collecting various cat food adverts to share with you. While dogs are either cockneys (wrong) or talk like the dog from that credit score advert (right), cats are apparently always after some. Not only that, but the owners seem to want some sexy doings with the cat, and no one bats an eyelid. Continue reading “An essay on sexy cat food adverts”