Your lunch box: a guide

Your lunch box: a guide

These days my lunch tends to be coffee and cigarettes, and doesn’t require a lunch box. That’s good, because packed lunches aren’t what they used to be, thanks to terrible inventions like cheeze ztringz and ‘lunch bags’ (which are absolutely no use in a fight).

If you want to do a proper packed lunch, you need to follow my handy and informative guide to not doing it like a div. That way, you can take your rightful place in the hall, sitting around those gold metal water jugs.

Now then.

Lunch box

RB lunch box

The cartoon or heartthrob of the day was the best thing to have on your lunch box, although there was an unwritten rule in our school which meant having a Take That lunch box would get you branded a ‘girl’. Even if you were a girl, this was unacceptable. Continue reading “Your lunch box: a guide”

Rainbow episode review: Dead Wrongers

Rainbow episode review: Dead Wrongers

Today we are reviewing this episode:

bungle jane

People who follow me on Twatter will be familiar with this picture whether they want to be or not, because I tweet it several times an hour. Today, we’re going to answer the age-old question that no one asked except me: Why is Bungle dressed as Jane?

Disclaimer: I have an ear infection and things aren’t making much sense to me at the moment. I’m not sure how watching Bungle going round in a skirt will help matters, but this is what I’m choosing to do. Continue reading “Rainbow episode review: Dead Wrongers”

Our new cat overlords and the pet shop from hell

Our new cat overlords and the pet shop from hell

I found this in the 1973 Playhour annual, which I own because I am cool and hard. I wanted to share it with you guys because it makes, at best, 4% sense.

It is a double page art entitled NUM-NUM AND THE PUSS-CATS VISIT A PET SHOP.

Click the picture for a larger version. Have holy water ready.

num num large

I have all sorts of conflicting feelings about this fresco, which I will share with you in this academic essay. Continue reading “Our new cat overlords and the pet shop from hell”

Rainbow episode review: The Crap Fair

I’m watching this episode blind. I have no idea what it’s about, or even what it’s called – it’s a random episode I found on Youtube. It could be about the plight of the Tolpuddle Martyrs, or it could be about one of them losing a pencil. Both are equally likely.

The gang are playing some bullshit with giant cards. Jane is arranging some flowers because she is the woman one.


I have no idea why she’s arranging flowers in their house – did any of them say they wanted any flowers? I bet they didn’t. You don’t go round to someone else’s house and do flower arranging there. This adds further reinforcement to my theory that Rod, Jane and Freddy live in the Rainbow kitchen. Continue reading “Rainbow episode review: The Crap Fair”